I’m not sure what it was that I expected. How it’s actually turned out is probably not what I would have said in October 2019 when I first put out the idea that I’d start an MSc.
Last month, December 2023, I got my final result for a year-long research module. The module was the culmination of three-and-a-half years of study. Yes, I’d taken a few breaks here and there, as dates didn’t match up, but it was fairly solid study during that time.
There are many things to reflect upon. Some of this is to do with the ‘content’ of my study; some is to do with the way in which the study was conducted; much of it is about my own personal journey. All of these things are interconnected, which is great as my MSc subject was Systems Thinking in Practice, which encompasses the interconnectedness of everything in a bounded situation, and how we choose to engage with that situation as well as the improvements we might make along the way. It’s also about how and what we learn as we engage with a situation.
What took me by surprise was that I had to learn why I learned what I was learning. I hadn’t bargained on this level of reflection. Nor had I considered how important it would be.
What I was learning
Systems Thinking is a term that describes the discipline of understanding and interacting with complex, interrelated ‘things’, often intractable issues for which there is no simple solution. Contrary to its name, it is not about technology in the sense of software and hardware. It’s actually, quite a lot, about people. However, it brings together some principles of economics, engineering, philosophy, sociology, and organisational design.
Again, I thought it was going to be fairly constrained in what it taught, but I’d not taken into account the ‘in Practice’ part of the MSc. This was about learning the theory of cybernetics and Systems Thinking and applying it to, often, live situations I was experiencing.
Of course, I came away with tools, frameworks, and models – and ways to use them – that continue to prove useful in a multitude of situations.
Mostly, though, I learned about learning. And about myself. I’m not sure if this is just the process of post-grad study (or any study) as it’s been a while since I undertook anything so formal in terms of learning. Doing the course changed me in ways that I could not have comprehended at the outset. It enabled me to ask better questions of myself, of the work I was doing, of the reason behind decisions being taken and the direction the work was headed.
Learning
One of the principles of the MSc was to think about second and third-order effects, which often meant thinking about what I was learning while learning it, and thinking about how I was learning while thinking about what I was learning while learning it. To observe myself as objectively as possible while learning. It was as hard as it sounds; however, once I’d got a handle on this – mostly through blogging, which the academic world calls ‘journaling’ – I found the process of learning deepened in ways that I hadn’t anticipated.
I could really see where I needed to pay attention – really see it. I could stop myself jumping to conclusions and to critically evaluate decisions before they were taken. I could work faster, too, which was counter-intuitive. Why? About part-way through a research project about maps and learning, I realised that I wasn’t just thinking systemically, I was behaving systemically. I was systemic. It was a shift that I needed to make to take on the final year-long research project.
Rigour
I don’t think I was necessarily slap-dash before. What I did was determine a starting point and move from there. The thinking systemically stopped all that. I had to make a proper decision about where to start. That may sound terribly time consuming, but it’s a bit like planning to move before you move, to consider a number of possibilities before you start out on the journey. Another counter-intuitive outcome was that this opened up more opportunities as well as making it easier to discount some possibilities simply by thinking in a more systemic and critical way.
It ultimately meant that I started from the right point rather than tracing my path towards that starting point and having to rush, or missing things until it was too late. It gave me a lot of questions to answer, and a lot of answers to share and discuss, or simply to contemplate on the daily dog walks. It opened my thinking up, and by thinking more I got faster at it. I like to think I got better, but that’s subjective.
I learned how to learn properly. Not just academically, but how to take in large swathes of information and manufacture knowledge from it. This could then be used to gather more information, test theories and hypotheses, to find arguments that would stand up to scrutiny (or not, which was just as important), and to allow me to justify my decisions in ways that could be communicated easily.
Language
I’ve always written. For years. I love words and how they can be put together in ways that make them persuasive, or oddball, or intriguing or simply comfortable on the tongue – kinda like mouthfeel but for sentences.
Systems Thinking gave me a language I knew I needed but hadn’t known where to find it. I finally had the vocabulary to make the connections and relationships between information and knowledge in my head becomes tangible. It allowed me to see boundaries as not just a constraint but to understand how language could bring the focus necessary to bring about beneficial improvements.
It also showed me that language is more than words. Diagramming became my new lexicon. Grappling with this new language was hard work, but once I’d found a way to use it, oh, it rewarded me in so many ways. The ability to show why something wasn’t working with a simple causal loop diagram, or how invisible ‘actors’ would be affected by decisions thanks to developing clearer strategic relationship diagrams… these new ways of ‘talking’ and ‘discussing’ were one of the best things to come out of my study. Suddenly, very complex situations could be condensed into simple structures understandable by all – and most importantly, able to be discussed in groups and then redrawn.
Language evolves. Word and imagery meanings shift between different people. Through discussing diagrams and models, so definitions were clarified, agreed upon and adopted. In fact, using these in my work taught others how these models and diagrams could be used, which broadened my understanding of them. I was able to learn how others learned and how I learned, all at the same time. Reaching back to my thinking around the ‘How of Work’, I could immediately see where I was going with that idea. Now I had the grammar with which to construct. I was able to start to become fluent.
People
I’ve always been interested in people. I look back over my various career (haha) choices and realise that I’ve always been in the service of people. To help them make better decisions. And while some of those choices, in hindsight, may not have been the best way to do this, I’ve come around to realising that the messiness of people who find themselves in situations they are struggling to comprehend, or deal with, is where I am best suited. As an advisor, a confidant, an orienteer.
It’s to this I am turning towards for new projects in 2024.
Everything Improves
These things, which have wrought very big changes in myself have, understandably, created seismic shifts in how I work and the projects I take on. In fact, in some cases they’ve stopped me in my tracks and made me reconsider things; in others, they’ve allowed me to run at a faster pace and rely on iterative maps to get my to the next milestone. And then, working through the layers of paths taken, to see clearly where errors exist, what the outcome might have been, and to equip myself with the knowledge and skills to ensure that mistakes do not get repeated – although they still get made, such is the way learning happens.
However, overall, I feel as if I have more agility to my performance. I know when to move forward towards unknowns, or with questions asked rather than answers provided. I would say I am a better guide for myself and for those with whom I work.
I now have a foundation. Not one from which to build, but one I can leave behind for others to build upon, that’s visible from wherever I head off to. It’s a foundation that has allowed me to explore. To go deeper, wider, higher, further, and to not get lost – or at least not fear getting lost – and to do so swiftly in any and all directions.
I am also looking inward. Not in a selfish sense, but in ways that help me understand my own learning and how I can use these discoveries to build better paths for others I come to work with. One clear-cut outcome of this is that much of my work didn’t deliver enough joy for me. I’d already began to fall out of love with it as the course progressed.
It’s this that has led to me creating Unspun Heroes, a side project that changes that outlook. And for once, it’s a side project that makes money and isn’t done for the sake of doing something creative, or funny. Even though it is creative, and it is fun (if not ha-funny-ha). It’s the first major change that’s having a real positive effect on fundamental aspects of my life. And while I’m starting again in many respects – not to mention the upheaval that it’s wreaking on my consultancy work – I’m happy with how things are going, the questions I’m asking of myself and opportunities it is opening up.
If nothing else, it’s putting some distance into the rear view mirror on the darker times of 2023. And that is a very good thing.